Psychology since the early years
The psychologist of development Mary Ainsworth claimed that during the first years of life (0-3years) the called *model of mental work* is added to one and others based on experiences we had with our parents. In that place, informations about if one can trust his nearest beings are added; this has a big meaning for how one will see others later in life - if they wish us good or bad.
If one translates the acts of an adult person in a negative way, one can have thoughts as ''I don't deserve love'', ''I am nothing'' or ''I wish I didn't exist''.
THE AFFILIATION MODEL FOR CHILDREN
A good interaction between the child and the adult is important for positive feelings and reinforces the capacity to regulate them. The sentimental development during the first 3 years of the child are about getting to know his own feelings, learn to tolerate them and express them in an adequate manner and differentiate own feelings from other's feelings.
The called *Circle of security* (Powell, Cooper, Hoffman and Marvin) is a model that illustrates how these needs are constantly dependent on each other.
CHILDHOOD TRAUMAS
Sometimes, but not all times, there is a relationship between previous experiences and how a person experiments their own existence later in life. If one doesn't have a secure foundation, one ''scans'' the world for dangers and this defence continues to protect himself.
To avoid that a traumatism happens again, the brain never forgets what happened. The mind and the feelings remember, but the thoughts do not necessarily do so because it could be too overwhelming. One could very often have a ''relational damage'' which could make it difficult for them to believe in the fact that others will wish one well and doubt that they deserve better.
Psychological and physical mistreatment can create functional and structural changes in the mind. F.ex rape, violence and underestimation, negative criticism and being left aside can make tolerating and regulating feelings and having close relationships with others difficult. Traumas can create big challenges in relation to other human beings. When one doesn't learn to regulate own feelings in a convenient way, they can unleash because of insignificant things. Other people can perceive this as incomprehensible and out of context.
TOLERANCE WINDOW
When a person is traumatised, they explode for the least of things.
PERCEPTION AND INTERPRETATION
Because we make an idea of who we are through how we see that others see us during childhood, many people feel meaningless because of rejections or lack of attention from their parents. A kid notices the lack of interest coming from his parents and translates it quickly as not being important enough as for them to take care of him.
When a child feels he is not being noticed or accepted the way he is, he feels the painful feeling of not having his place in this world.
When we are aware of the way we react when being stressed or in other negative situations, we can understand other's reactions and how they perceive us.
If one translates the acts of an adult person in a negative way, one can have thoughts as ''I don't deserve love'', ''I am nothing'' or ''I wish I didn't exist''.
THE AFFILIATION MODEL FOR CHILDREN
A good interaction between the child and the adult is important for positive feelings and reinforces the capacity to regulate them. The sentimental development during the first 3 years of the child are about getting to know his own feelings, learn to tolerate them and express them in an adequate manner and differentiate own feelings from other's feelings.
The called *Circle of security* (Powell, Cooper, Hoffman and Marvin) is a model that illustrates how these needs are constantly dependent on each other.
CHILDHOOD TRAUMAS
Sometimes, but not all times, there is a relationship between previous experiences and how a person experiments their own existence later in life. If one doesn't have a secure foundation, one ''scans'' the world for dangers and this defence continues to protect himself.
To avoid that a traumatism happens again, the brain never forgets what happened. The mind and the feelings remember, but the thoughts do not necessarily do so because it could be too overwhelming. One could very often have a ''relational damage'' which could make it difficult for them to believe in the fact that others will wish one well and doubt that they deserve better.
Psychological and physical mistreatment can create functional and structural changes in the mind. F.ex rape, violence and underestimation, negative criticism and being left aside can make tolerating and regulating feelings and having close relationships with others difficult. Traumas can create big challenges in relation to other human beings. When one doesn't learn to regulate own feelings in a convenient way, they can unleash because of insignificant things. Other people can perceive this as incomprehensible and out of context.
TOLERANCE WINDOW
When a person is traumatised, they explode for the least of things.
PERCEPTION AND INTERPRETATION
Because we make an idea of who we are through how we see that others see us during childhood, many people feel meaningless because of rejections or lack of attention from their parents. A kid notices the lack of interest coming from his parents and translates it quickly as not being important enough as for them to take care of him.
When a child feels he is not being noticed or accepted the way he is, he feels the painful feeling of not having his place in this world.
When we are aware of the way we react when being stressed or in other negative situations, we can understand other's reactions and how they perceive us.
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